4 Ways We Stop Ourselves and How to Get Over it.

My entire life I have heard, “You need to get out of your own way”.

Sound familiar?

In my life it seems that I have always struggled with learning to focus, be disciplined or work one idea all the way through to completion.

Getting things 97% done and leaving the last 3%.

Mastering cutting corners and flying by the seat of my pants.

The never ending cycle of failing—succeeding—failing.

Thinking “Oh if only I work harder”.

Learn more and get smarter…

My mantra became “F-You. I am going to do it anyway!”

This left me with a life of accomplishments…

But no satisfaction.

Recently I became aware of  the 4 D’s that Destroy your Dreams.

Hell Yeah, those little Devils can rob you of your aliveness, passion and dreams.

So let’s get to it.

1. Distractions. (very insidious)

OMG are you alive? Everyday they crop up. Especially if you have no routine or structure to support you to be focused and powerful. Or like some of us you may have a structures but don’t use them or follow it (wink, wink, me too).

Rebel Tip: Put everything on your calendar. Book time to pause, create and have fun. Make sure you’re asking yourself “What would I love to do that supports me?”

“Listen to Your Heart not Your Head”

2. Delay (one of my favorites)

Do you find yourself saying “I’ll get back to it”. Somehow things just keep happening and the time to get back to it never happens.

You know what I mean.

So if you want to do it, really… put it in a structure for support: Your Calendar.

Rebel Tip: There are lots of books to get you on track with this (if you read and apply –wink, wink) One of my favorites is “Getting Things Done” by David Allen. I don’t have an linear mind so this can be very helpful.

3. Dissuasion (a biggie)

You can talk yourself out of it or allow other people, friends, family, partner to talk you out of it. And many times they are trying to be helpful, protect you (telling you it’s for your own good). That’s why it’s very important to surround yourself with people that don’t buy your B.S. That our pushing the envelope, constantly growing and developing so you are supported to do the same.

Rebel Tip: Build a supportive environment for yourself. Join a community and hire a mentor. Everything you want to accomplish in your life requires other people to make it happen.

And the biggest D-devil of them all…

4. Derailment

This one can be soooo hard to see and get a hold of sometimes… because it seems so Real. It comes in the form of a really good excuse. Something like “I got in a car accident, my children need my attention, my partner lost their job”…Not that these things aren’t happening. It’s more about who are you going to be and what actions are you going to take in the face of tragedies, and circumstances.

Derailments can stop you dead in your tracks. And it hijacks you with Fear. Many of us love to tell stories and are total drama queens too (wink, wink, me too). We like to process everything and tell stories to get agreement from others. Look for yourself and see if this is away you stop yourself and take yourself out of the game.

Rebel Tip: Shift your attention to taking an action (no matter how small) towards the direction you want to go. Shift your attention to something that is a whole lot more fun and interesting.

What I have discovered in my life and business (so far) is… all of this is a practice. The first step is to become aware of which of the 4 D’s is actually driving you. Staying out of judgment about it (no right or wrong), knowing you are greater than any circumstance and taking a simple action in the direction of your Dream. And remember…

It’s not over until you win!


Breathe Deeply, Laugh Loudly & Be Audacious




Did you love this or hate it?

Let me know and leave me a comment to what you saw for yourself.

And share with us anything you do that gets you out from under the hypnotic spell of the 4D’s and keeps you moving in the direction of your Dream.